Am-dram group auditions actor to play the stage directions after cast struggle with them

THE Fabricated Players are urgently seeking an actor to play the stage directions in their latest production after the existing cast proved unable to follow them.

Director Margaret Collins said the unusual casting decision became necessary after three weeks of rehearsals in which instructions such as crosses to the window, sits and exits left were repeatedly treated as optional suggestions.

She said: “We tried explaining the stage directions. We tried demonstrating them. We highlighted them in the scripts.

“Eventually Mary said, ‘Why don’t we just get somebody to do them?’”

The successful actor will remain on stage throughout the production physically performing every instruction as it appears in the script.

For example, when Brian’s script reads Brian looks nervously towards the door, Brian will continue staring blankly into the audience while the Stage Directions Actor stands beside him, looks nervously towards the door and then points at Brian to indicate that this is what he should have been doing.

Malcolm, who is playing the lead, welcomed the move.

He said: “There’s already quite a lot to remember with the words.

“Then Margaret suddenly expects me to walk somewhere as well.”

Particular difficulties have arisen with the instruction pause.

Margaret said: “Half the cast ignore it completely.

“The other half interpret it as an opportunity to stand silently for 40 seconds while the audience wonders whether someone has forgotten their line.

“We need a professional.”

Auditions will test candidates on a demanding selection of theatrical directions including crosses downstage, picks up letter, reacts with horror and the notoriously difficult exits.

Mary has already been ruled out after auditioning exits briskly and walking directly into the props cupboard.

The new performer will also be responsible for more complex directions.

During There is an awkward silence, they will enter carrying a sign saying AWKWARD SILENCE.

For the atmosphere becomes tense, they will stand between the actors looking increasingly concerned.

And whenever the script says they kiss passionately, the society is still working out what happens.

Brian said: “I think having somebody visibly perform the stage directions will really help the audience understand what our characters are supposed to be doing.

“Which, historically, hasn’t always been obvious.”

The society hopes the role could eventually be expanded to cover emotional directions, allowing the actor to cry, laugh and appear frightened on behalf of principals who are concentrating on remembering the dialogue.

Malcolm is particularly enthusiastic.

He said: “Apparently there’s one bit where my character ‘reacts with barely concealed fury’.

“I’ve been doing puzzled.”

The Stage Directions Actor will receive full programme credit and is expected at every rehearsal.

They will also understudy the cast.

Margaret said: “Given what we’ve seen so far, they may end up doing the whole bloody play.”