Fabricated Players announce ambitious new production of KFC: The Musical

THE Fabricated Players have delighted local theatre-goers by announcing their next production will be KFC: The Musical, an original theatrical spectacular celebrating chicken, ambition and 11 secret herbs and spices.

The society says the show will tell the inspirational story of Colonel Sanders, from humble beginnings to becoming the world’s most recognisable elderly man associated with a bucket.

Director Simon Clarke said: “It’s Hamilton meets Les Misérables meets a Boneless Banquet.

“At its heart, it’s about one man with a dream, a white suit and an absolutely staggering sodium intake.”

The musical opens with the rousing ensemble number I Dreamed a Dream of Gravy.

Other songs include The Colonel of the Opera, Don’t Cry for Me Original Recipe, Defrying Gravity, and the emotionally devastating Act Two ballad Memory (Of When the Krushem Machine Worked).

Auditions are expected to be fiercely contested, particularly for the coveted role of Colonel Sanders.

The production will feature a cast of 36, including the Colonel, three assistant Colonels, the Spirit of Gravy and a 22-strong chorus known as the Zinger Ensemble.

The society has promised its most technically ambitious set to date, featuring a revolving restaurant, an eight-foot bargain bucket and a functioning drive-through window which the stage manager has repeatedly explained they are “absolutely not building”.

Costumes will be historically accurate apart from the chickens, who will be wearing tap shoes.

Producer Deborah Mills said: “People sometimes dismiss amateur theatre as predictable, so we wanted to take a creative risk.

“That’s why we’ve chosen a completely original musical based around an internationally recognised commercial brand without asking them.”

The Fabricated Players insist lawyers have been consulted, although this was later clarified to mean one member knows somebody who once worked in conveyancing.

KFC has not endorsed the production and is understood to be unaware of its existence.

The society hopes to keep it that way until after closing night.