Spelling mistake leaves am-dram society with new Ruth instead of new roof

A YEAR-LONG fundraising campaign to buy a new roof for the Fabricated Players has ended in confusion after a spelling mistake resulted in the society acquiring a new Ruth instead.

The amateur dramatics group raised £14,000 through raffles, quiz nights, sponsored walks and repeatedly cornering audience members at the bar to fund urgent repairs to its leaking clubhouse roof.

However, a typo on the original fundraising application listed the society’s objective as “A New Ruth for the Fabricated Players”, which nobody noticed until Ruth arrived on Monday morning.

Chairman Fred Clarke said: “Obviously our first reaction was disappointment because the roof is still lashing water onto the lighting desk.

“But Ruth seems lovely.”

The new Ruth, 58, from Dorking, was formally handed over to the society following completion of the fundraising campaign and has already been issued with a membership card, clubhouse key and a copy of the safeguarding policy.

Ruth said: “I’m not entirely sure how this happened.

“I was told an amateur dramatics society had raised enough money for me and could I report to the rehearsal room at seven.

“I assumed they needed someone for the chorus.”

The society investigated whether Ruth could be returned and exchanged for roofing materials, but discovered that she is non-refundable.

Treasurer Jenny Mills said: “We’ve spent a year raising this money. We did Calendar Girls, two jumble sales and a sponsored 24-hour singalong.

“We cannot go back to people and tell them we accidentally bought a woman.”

Committee members are now attempting to make the best of the situation.

Ruth has already agreed to help front of house, make teas during rehearsals and play Mrs Pearce in My Fair Lady after Carol pulled out.

Clarke added: “When you look at it like that, she’s actually much more useful than a roof.

“A roof has never once offered to prompt.”

The existing roof remains in a critical condition, with buckets currently positioned throughout the clubhouse whenever it rains.

Members have been told not to worry, as another fundraising campaign will begin next month under the slogan “Raise the Roof”.

The publicity secretary has checked the spelling three times.

Unfortunately, the society is now legally committed to raising £20,000 for “Ray’s The Roof”.

Nobody knows who Ray is.

Ruth says she probably does.